I don't really know why I'm writing any of this here... I guess I just feel like writing it out. My grandmother actually just passed away this past weekend. I decided I would make the drive back this weekend, since I'd heard she'd been put in the hospital for something and I wanted to visit her and wish her a quick recover, because at that point, everyone was still hopeful that she would get better, but it turns out that the morning after I arrived, she took a sudden turn for the worse, and only had a few hours left to go. I got a call early in the morning from my mother saying that I needed to come over as soon as possible if I wanted a chance to say goodbye. It took me completely off-guard, since I didn't expect it to be nearly so serious.
It was really a remarkable thing though, being at her side as she passed away. I wasn't the only one, either. The hospital room was literally jam-packed with her children and grandchildren, all there to be there for her in her final hours. She had told us that she wouldn't have wanted things to end any other way. The sheer love and affection in that room was palpable, I've never experienced anything quite like it before. It was an incredibly hard thing to be there through, but it must have been one of the most powerful experiences of my life.
It's still a bit strange though, I don't think that her passing has really hit me quite yet. She's been there my entire life, always less than a half-hour away. We came over to visit countless times; she'd been there for many of my most cherished memories. I just don't really think it's registered with my brain yet that all of that is over now, even though I was there to see her take her last breath. God, it's a hard thing to have to work through mentally. You just get so emotionally drained that you just have to do something to take your mind off of it... and yet in the back of your head you know all you're doing is delaying the inevitable... *sigh*, it's always a tough time to go through. It's just hard picturing her as not being there anymore...
But really getting to the heart what this thread is all about, I think what's truly saddening about the death of a loved one is that death is one of the few things in life, perhaps the only thing, that cannot be reversed, mitigated, compensated for, replaced, nothing. When someone dies, someone you love, someone who loves you, there's nothing that can ever replace it. Only their memory can live on. The human experience is the one thing we all share, and the one thing we will all lose.
At any rate, the funeral is set for tomorrow morning, so I'd best get some sleep. Have a nice day everyone.
It was really a remarkable thing though, being at her side as she passed away. I wasn't the only one, either. The hospital room was literally jam-packed with her children and grandchildren, all there to be there for her in her final hours. She had told us that she wouldn't have wanted things to end any other way. The sheer love and affection in that room was palpable, I've never experienced anything quite like it before. It was an incredibly hard thing to be there through, but it must have been one of the most powerful experiences of my life.
It's still a bit strange though, I don't think that her passing has really hit me quite yet. She's been there my entire life, always less than a half-hour away. We came over to visit countless times; she'd been there for many of my most cherished memories. I just don't really think it's registered with my brain yet that all of that is over now, even though I was there to see her take her last breath. God, it's a hard thing to have to work through mentally. You just get so emotionally drained that you just have to do something to take your mind off of it... and yet in the back of your head you know all you're doing is delaying the inevitable... *sigh*, it's always a tough time to go through. It's just hard picturing her as not being there anymore...
But really getting to the heart what this thread is all about, I think what's truly saddening about the death of a loved one is that death is one of the few things in life, perhaps the only thing, that cannot be reversed, mitigated, compensated for, replaced, nothing. When someone dies, someone you love, someone who loves you, there's nothing that can ever replace it. Only their memory can live on. The human experience is the one thing we all share, and the one thing we will all lose.
At any rate, the funeral is set for tomorrow morning, so I'd best get some sleep. Have a nice day everyone.