Prenuptial agreement

Status
Not open for further replies.

Sanity Panda

-chan
Kouhai
QUOTE (Prenuptial agreement)a written contract between two people who are about to marry, setting out terms concerning division of assets, earnings, and property if the marriage is later dissolved

How would you react if your partner asked you to sign the agreement?

Personally I feel that it undermines an important aspect to what love should be. The idea that love is about placing you trust in another person, and hoping or having faith that they won't screw you over. Therefore the idea of having an insurance on your relationship just reeks of lack of trust.

Can signing it be a totally rational and sensible thing, and has nothing to do with the relationship working in the future?
 

LuckiCharmzXP

-san
Kouhai
i would ask why did they want this agreement. They make it seem like their relationship won't last for a long time. Signing i would say makes it seem like you still want to be with them, but also shows that your in tthe palm of their hand (or something like that). Not signing it has a vice versa way of point of view.

Or they can be really stubborn and they had a contract so you won't betray them without loss. (did i say that correctly?)
 

Patrick5087

-san
Kouhai
from a romantic point of view no its one of the worset things you can do.

But from a business point of view its the best thing you can do.

I guess its just the transformation of the Labor sort of work into the more corporate sort of work. From dealing with hardships and continuing to move on, to having relationships just for fun sort of thing. At least that is the way I have analyzed it. Has anyone looked at the divorce rates by class? But I guess you have to also count abandonments the same as divorces so not to keep it that narrow.
 

mamori

-sama
Sempai
prenuptial contracts are one of the most rational things a soon to be married couple should do. despite common beliefs, they are not limited to only the terms of divorce, nor are they always to the disadvantage of one in these cases. these contracts are also a good way to discuss and get down on paper what each of you expects from the marriage before hand. thus, if at this time you feel the contract is "unfair," then you shouldn't be getting married. simple as that.

marriage isn't and shouldn't be ABOUT romance, though romance certainly helps things along.
 

Hiroyuki

-sama
Retired
I think that prenuptials have no legal force in the UK but apparently that is going to change soon, so I better find a rich person to marry quickly I think or I may miss the boat.... if you are rich, female, beautiful and gullible please PM me....

Prenuptuals do seem a very unromantic thing, but you could see it as a test, if your love is strong enough to survive being asked to sign away your rights then maybe it's strong enough to last other things too like the other person having affairs etc....
 

monsta666

-the bee's knees
Staff member
Fansub TV Team
Anything that makes the process of divorce more smooth can never be a completely bad thing. Divorce is a distressing experience for all parties involved especially if it becomes a protracted affair. So there are good reasons to use them. One can argue they are not romantic but marriage is not all about love there are practicalities to consider as well. This agreement can prepare people for the worst.

Saying that I'm not that sure how useful it is to make expectations over a marriage. Marriages are relationships not businesses. The relationship is about learning and discovery. 5 year plans are unnecessary (perhaps they are even counter productive). As long as you prepare for the worst the rest is irrelevant.

QUOTE (Hiroyuki @ Jun 30 2008, 12:22 AM)Prenuptuals do seem a very unromantic thing, but you could see it as a test, if your love is strong enough to survive being asked to sign away your rights then maybe it's strong enough to last other things too like the other person having affairs etc....
Not signing a prenuptial agreement may also be seen as a strength of love. You are putting everything on the line. At least with this agreement you know what you are losing and so there is a degree of safety. Ultimately these agreements are made because of a lack of faith. Lack of faith that the marriage will last. If you were convinced your marriage would last there would be no need to sign a agreement in the first place.
 

mamori

-sama
Sempai
but that's like saying you won;t buy insurance because you have faith in your driving ability.

and one could argue if you truely loved your partner, you would want to set up a prenup to ensure their happiness even if the marriage does not work out. people often forget that prenups are also used to protect the non working/part time spouse afterwords, securing them economically, at least while they get to a point where they can fend for themselves.

and as previously mentioned, anything that makes the divorce process along smoothly can't be all that bad
 

monsta666

-the bee's knees
Staff member
Fansub TV Team
QUOTE (mamori @ Jun 30 2008, 03:20 AM)but that's like saying you won;t buy insurance because you have faith in your driving ability.
I'm just saying it's a common argument against prenuptial agreements. Also your required by law to have car insurance (at least in Britain it is). So your not given that luxury.

I don't take travel insurance when I go abroad because I don't think anything bad will happen to me. Perhaps I'm being naive and putting too much faith in the hotel I stay etc. The same could be said about not taking prenuptial agreements.
 

shinigamii

-geass prince~
Sempai
Hmm Prenuptial agreements, very interesting topic you have here.

i dont tihnk their a bad or good thing myself, i actually consider them to be an extra lifeline for couples that or on the brink of divorce, but they can also bring around a divorce between two couples for example if a man who owns a house a luxury car and earns a good living was to be engaged to a women but then she requested a Prenuptial agreement to him he should start to think is she only after my money but if the man suggested it where he already has everything it would show his true love for the female, him willing to share everything hes got.

it all depends on which way you think of it. They are a good thing for couples who dont trust each other and tihnk they may go off with another person but at the same time a bad thing for couples who do have trust in each other. Think about it if someone who trusts their partner were to propose the idea to their other half what would the other half think. Is he/she planning on leaving me? Is she/he trying to buy me off? when the person is only thinking of the other person at a time like that.

all in all it all depends on how one thinks on it because it neither a bad or good thing to start with just what the circumstances make it.
 

Neriko

-san
Kouhai
@shinigamii Your last post is slightly confusing. if the richer man asks for the prenuptial then he is interested in protecting his money. Not that he is going to give it up to the wife when they divorce.

Atleast this is from my understanding. I could just as well be wrong.
 

Eiensama

New Member
Kouhai
so logically if I were - god forbid - getting married and my husband/wife-to-be showed me this?

logically, I'd freak out and ask "sorry but come again?"

logically, that's not the thing you'd expect your spouse to do but despite all, it is a good thing. after all, too many couples have problems now, just too many, and it doesn't matter if you marry out of love or for money. love can vanish and no, that doesn't mean it's not strong enough, the chemistry and natural attraction might disappear, simple as that, so this kind of an agreement could be basically seen as a way how to make sure the parties don't end up sueing each other after divorce.

could being the keyword, of course, seeing as both partners need to agree on it. if only one person does it, it's them covering their back and getting a plan B. but either way, it could be helpful - when you're getting divorced and you want it to be over soon then it does come in handy knowing what you'll have left (besides those entirely happy memories of the marriage)
 

Sanity Panda

-chan
Kouhai
QUOTE (Eiensama @ Jul 18 2008, 07:24 AM) could being the keyword, of course, seeing as both partners need to agree on it. if only one person does it, it's them covering their back and getting a plan B. but either way, it could be helpful - when you're getting divorced and you want it to be over soon then it does come in handy knowing what you'll have left (besides those entirely happy memories of the marriage)
Aww...
But it'd be more likely to be not so pleasent memories if you are trying to sue each other
blink.gif
 

EggBeast

- deska`
Retired
Well, prenuptial agreements are far from romantic, but there's always a time and place for them. I don't see them as and absolute damper on a relationship. There's a difference between expecting a relationship to end and accepting that it may not last forever.

...I don't really have much more to that than that. Whether or not a "prenup" would be offensive, demeaning, or selfish is entirely situational, although I don't see most marriage situations calling for one.
 

warita200

Tai Youkai
Sempai
QUOTE (Sanity Panda @ Jun 28 2008, 08:39 PM) QUOTE (Prenuptial agreement)a written contract between two people who are about to marry, setting out terms concerning division of assets, earnings, and property if the marriage is later dissolved

How would you react if your partner asked you to sign the agreement?

Personally I feel that it undermines an important aspect to what love should be. The idea that love is about placing you trust in another person, and hoping or having faith that they won't screw you over. Therefore the idea of having an insurance on your relationship just reeks of lack of trust.

Can signing it be a totally rational and sensible thing, and has nothing to do with the relationship working in the future?
you are definately right.

But dont forget, there are a lot of ppl out there, both male and female, who can pretend to be in love with you just to get something from you, be it money or other advantages and they do a splendid jon on deceiving you. So unless you are a great psychologist and you think you can unmask such people, a marriage contract is a better option to protect yourself from such individuals.

Besides, nowadays, when ppl can married and divorced like on a running belt, and during the divorce scratch each others eyes out.... I still think it is better to have a
contract.
smile.gif
 

ridgwell

New Member
Kouhai
If you wanted a prenuptial template then the [snip] sell one for £19.99.

They suggest you start by filling one of these out then visit a solicitor to finalise the details. That way you save the money it would have cost you for your solicitor to prepare the initial document (which could easily go into hundreds of pounds)

Google [snip] to find the page
 

mosque

-chi
Kouhai
I think you are about 2 years too late.
laugh.gif


Sad that the thoughtful section has been dead lately.
I'm not cool or smart enough to start a thread though.
cool.gif


MOD Note: Closed because this thread is rather old, and didn't need any necromancy for it either.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Playasia - Play-Asia.com: Online Shopping for Digital Codes, Video Games, Toys, Music, Electronics & more
Top